Holidays/Funny About HMOs/2 by bSue/"reality"

Peace On Earth!

Also Happy Birthday Jim Spitzer December 19th!

(P1) Political (Health)

All About HMO's? :-P

Q. What does HMO stand for?

A. This is actually a variation of the phrase,"HEY MOE". Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Moe of the Three Stooges, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eye.

Q. I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want?

A. Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents. Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors in the plan. The doctors basically fall into two categories: those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer participating in the plan. But don't worry, the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting n ew patients has an office just a half-day's drive away and a diploma from a third world country .

Q. Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?A. No. Only those you need.

Q. Can I get coverage for my preexisting conditions?

A. Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment.

Q. What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine?

A. You'll need to find alternative forms of payment.

Q. My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand. I tried the generic medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do?

A. Poke yourself in the eye.

Q. What if I'm away from home and I get sick?

A. You really shouldn't do that.

Q. I think I need to see a specialist, but my doctor insists he can handle my problem. Can a general practitioner really perform a heart transplant right in his/her office?

A. Hard to say, but considering that all you're risking is the $20 co-payment, there's no harm in giving it a shot.

Q. Will health care be different in the next decade?

A. No, but if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then.

To Your Good Health (because as you'll see, you'll need it!)

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(P2) Poetical

Two By bSue

PROVINCE

The tree must
spend its entire life
in just one place,

And this rock will never
taste cordon bleu,
or smell warm muffins
just from the oven.

The North American weasel
will never hear
a symphony;

A creek doesn’t really
have a mother;

The millions of tiny noseeums
would not recognize
our president,

And I may not
ever know
What it is
Just to be.

(bSue Stephenson)

PAPER

I am this fine paper.
The lines written here
Are my life:
Placed upon
They display a certain meaning,
Illusional purpose,
Warmth.

I am not the lines
(Though they are upon me
And I love them so,
And I exist here because of them)
Just as I am not the things I do
Or the people I love,
The ones who love me,
Or even the words I myself
Have written.

I am thin, white,
Delicate,
And can easily be
Crinkled,
And thrown in with the nearest
Trash.

(bSue Stephenson)

Comment Here on any of the above or below and read the comments of others too. Log in under "Nickname" or "Anonymous" if you like, but please be sure to sign some facsimile of your name. Actual name is best, but use what you like. Or email me at edcoletti@sbcglobal.net.

(P3) Philosophical

Reality, no matter how widened and heightened our perceptions, never ceases to be anything but the effect on us of an infinite mystery.

(Laurens van der Post)

Comment Here on any of the above or below and read the comments of others too. Log in under "Nickname" or "Anonymous" if you like, but please be sure to sign some facsimile of your name. Actual name is best, but use what you like. Or email me at edcoletti@sbcglobal.net.